215th Post

A grey afternoon.

Neither sunny.
Nor raining.

A perfect weather to suit my mood.
Neither happy.
Nor sad.

Just feeling empty.
No more purpose in life.

Just spending the remaining days of my life.

Inducing more and more alcohol.
In a futile effort to escape from this nightmarish reality.

I just simply as usual.
Feel like throwing everything away.

My life.
My future.
Everything.

Sigh.

My final wish.

Put a razor blade to my neck.
And slice it open ever so slowly.
From ear to ear.

And watch the blood flow.

As my body turns cold and lifeless.

I give you.
My last bloodied kisses.
My last hug.
My final smiles.

I bid you.
My last goodbye.

Once i am gone.

Cut my head off.
Impale it onto the longest spear.
Hoist up the spear.

So that i may watch.
As the world goes up in flames.

Engulfed.
By the fires of hell.