167th Post

Another night.

With a storm raging.
And the winds howling.

Like there is no tomorrow.

Sometimes.
I sit in silence and ponder.

Is it better to be the bad guy sometimes?
Or would it be better to be the good guy?
Or to be a mixture of both?

Of course.
We cannot bear to inflict hurt.
On the ones we love.

So what will it take?

A lie?
Or the blatant hurtful truth?
Or a mix of both?

I don't know.

I'm mentally tired.

Ever had that feeling?
That you are slowly being eaten.
From the inside out.

I wish i can truly say.
That i don't care anymore.
But can i?

Can i?

I know i may appear to be the cold hearted bastard.
But deep inside.
It's hurting real bad.
To be the bad guy.

But sometimes.
I don't have a choice.

Is it true?
When people say its easier to be the bad guy.
Than to be the good guy.

Maybe?
Maybe not?

Sigh.
I hate it.

Silently missing my lovely angel.
But still clinging onto hope.
That i will get to see her soon.

Hope the heartache of missing her.
Will dissipate soon.

But for now.
Guess i will have to live with that silent heartache.

Time to end for now.
My mood is at its limit.
I'm tired.

I wish for my bed.
Where i can curl up.

And convert.
My silent pains.
Into tears of blood.