165th Post

Another night.

Another thought to ponder.

What does the word "forever" mean?
What springs to mind whenever that word is mentioned?

Diamonds?
Love?

Do they really last forever?
Or will they eventually fade with time?

Guess nothing lasts forever.
Even though we claim this or that lasts (or will last) forever.
But eventually.
Talk fades with time.

So what is truly forever?
What is the final definition on the word "forever"?

Guess i leave it up to your own opinions and thoughts.
For now.
I am too tired to ponder over that question.

My cheek hurts.
From the constant cutting of a tooth gone rogue.
So eating will be a slight difficulty for now.

Missing her as usual.
Counting down the days until i get to see her again.

Am feeling tired easily nowadays.
Is it due to mentally?
Or physically?
Or perhaps a mix of both.

I don't know.
I suddenly feel that the darkness is returning.
Slowly but surely.

That dreaded feeling returns.
But i can't pinpoint the exact cause.

I just feel despair.
And loneliness.

Things which i thought i could learn to live with.
Were sadly realized to be otherwise.

Sigh.

Hate it.
Hate it.

I long to just drop to the floor.
And scream in agony.

To let loose all my pent up pain.
Pain that was restrained by silence.

Sucks doesn't it?
When you want to let it all out.
But prevailing circumstances prevents it so.

And so.
Silence is the only option left.

The Painful Silence.

I just wish.
To just simply fade away.

In silence.

To end it.
Once and for all.
This life of deceit and depression.