152nd Post

Who am i ?

What am i ?

Why am i being put here on earth to suffer?
What is my purpose here?

Is there a heaven?
Is there a hell?

Is there a god?
Is there a devil?

I don't know.
Perhaps was never meant to know.

On the outside.
I can lie to others.
Create an illusion that i am okay.

But inside me.
Is an empty shell.
Nothing remains.

The old former me that used to occupy that space.
Is long dead.

Now resides.
A broken.
And silent spirit.

One that sheds its bloodied tears in silence.
One that laments on the ills of society.
One that is almost driven to the brink of total shutdown.

Nothing left now.
But to live out my remaining years in isolation and silence.
Never again to fully reveal my inner thoughts to others.
And to consume my usual poison of choice.

I got no one to blame.
But myself.
And the choices that i made.

And hence my final choice.
To become a mute.

I don't want to make anymore mistakes.

If there is anyone willing to hear my this silent plea.
Help me please.

I can't take it anymore.