148th Post

Nothing left to do.

But to consume my poison.

Confused.
Lost.

What am i looking for?
What do i want?

I don't know anymore.
Don't give a fuck.

I fear one day my anger and wrath.
Will decide what i will say or do next.

I feel like i can't cage them any longer.
I feel weak.

I don't feel like picking myself up after i fall.
But to just lie down there and rot.

Like the zombie that i am now.

It's ironic.
I can help others.
But my own life is in shambles.

Crumbling.
Into silent nothingness.

Life seems meaningless now.
An empty purpose.

Right now.
I just want to go to a deserted island.

And scream.

Scream till my voice gives way.
Scream till my lungs explode.

And to finally collapse in a puddle of tears.
And cry like i have never cried.

I'm tired.
So tired.

When will it all end?

I can't take it anymore.
All i see and feel.
Is misery.
And anguish.