304th Post

It has been said.

Time will heal all wounds.

But is it applicable?

There are some who refuse to step out of the past.
And there are also some who only carry it out half hearted.

Sigh.
I don't know.

I have not really fully stepped out of my own past yet.
So there are some wounds and scars that still remain to this day.

Wounds and scars that constantly remind me of the past.
Which i hate so much.

And it causes me great anguish.

Causing me to build up a wall to surround myself.
Locking down bit by bit.

Making friends fade away from my life one by one.

There are many avenues of escape.
But how long do i want to keep running?

Ordinary people will proclaim that i am a fool.
But it's just basic tactics.

To retreat.
Until one can find the right time.
And the right solution to deal with it.

I am mentally exhausted.
Crushed beyond hope of ever redeeming myself.

If i am given just one wish.
I will wish for the impossible.
And that is to turn back the clock.

To relive my life.
Armed with the lessons learned from the future.
And not repeat the mistakes again.

But sadly.
It's never going to happen.

And so.
This is the price i must pay for my mistakes of the past.

A price.

Written.
Paid.
And signed for.

In blood.